Slot Machine Tips To Help You Win At Pokies Laugh At and Mock Openly

If you’ve come to this page with the hope of finding out the secrets to winning more money playing the pokies and would somehow learn how to win at pokies and slots you are about to leave bitterly dissapointed. But before you do go let us clarify something that – like a porcupine covered in stale peanut butter – is probably going to be a little hard to swallow.

Here it goes (are you ready?) –

“THERE IS NO WAY TO CHEAT ON MODERN POKIES. NOR IS THERE A ‘SECRET’ HACK THAT WILL HELP YOU WIN AT SLOTS. – IN FACT I’D EVEN GO SO FAR AS TO SAY THE ONLY SLOT MACHINE TIPS IN EXISTENCE ARE THE COINS AND NOTES YOU ACCIDENTALLY LOSE/LEAVE IN THE SLOT MACHINE – WHICH IS NOW IT’S TIP. AWFUL NICE OF YOU TO LEAVE A TIP TO A MACHINE I MIGHT ADD!”

There we said it. Admittedly the truth looks a bit lonely lying there all on its lonesome – but it does feel uplifting to finally have it out in the open for everyone to see. It’s ok to point and laugh, I mean as Jack Nicholson pointed out, most people can’t handle the truth and as such the the riock can smell bullshit slot machine tips when he sees thempointing and the laughing is the next best thing.
Some players like Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson – who just happens to be a most awesome of dudes and clearly not like “most people” can indeed handle the truth, although he himself will be the first to raise the alarm when his olfactory glands let on that perhaps handling the truth is not something they came prepared for. And speaking of being prepared, let’s do our best ‘Bayden Powell’ and examine some of the thicker piles of bullshit that seem to be attracted to most pages talking about how to win on pokies and various slot machine tips to help you win more money playing online casino games.

For Those That CAN Handle The Truth (Read On)

most slot machine tips are a crock of shit and contain no truthFor too long we have seen articles talk about the tricks to playing pokies and talking about how “PRACTICE” and “TAKING ADVANTAGE OF THE FREE POKIES VERSION” Can help you improve as a player and increase your skills to a point that they can actually contribute to you winning more – and doing so consistently. POPPY COCK!
I think the image to your left does the most effective job of explaining how most of us feel about the hints and tips we read pertaining to how to win at slots and how to win at pokies – and all the other completely ridiculous Slot Machine Tips but for some reason these same hints and tips seem to circulate around and around like a toilet that never wants to finish its cycle of flushing.

Let’s take a look at some of these recycled turds and see if we can …”abide the aroma thereof” long enough to examine these pokies and slot machine tips in detail – but first we are going to do something that will in essence flush away 90% of the bullshit in one clean go – we’re going to take a look at How Pokies Work. By knowing how the pokies work you will instantly get a better understanding of why no amount of hints and tips will help you improve your gameplay, and more importantly we’ll be able to dispell a good 99% of the Bullshit encrusted myths that circulate through pubs, clubs and casino floors across Australia.

Visit this HOW POKIES WORK Page Here and Watch Us DESTROY EVERY POKIE MYTH IN EXISTENCE! If you’d like a really (really really) detailed guide detailing exactly how pokies work and why they are designed to cause addiction then read this really (really really) detailed guide that our friends over at RSLPokies have put together highlighting in detail How Pokies Work and Why You’ll Never Win

Now That We’ve Established HOW Pokies Work – Can We Increase Our Chances of Winning?

They say practice makes perfect, and sure if you’re playing a game of tennis or throwing darts then yeah, practicing will indeed help you improve as you develop muscle memory and fine tune your overall skills. But Pokies? When researching strategies to increase your odds on the pokies I came across many tips that referred to practicing and advising that playing the pokie a few times helps you get better at it and gives you more chance of winning?! Wait. What??! “How can pressing buttons that generate a repetitive Ranom Number Generating Algorithm constitute practice in any way, shape or form? Practicing by pressing buttons on the pokies doesn’t make perfect –  it makes broke! “BUT. Practicing the pokies when you actually know why you are doing it and what the purpose of this ‘practice’ is results in information that has the potential to swing the odds in your favour.

The Random Number Generator in action - How Pokies Work

The Random Number Generator in action – How Pokies Work

My One Genuine Slot Machine Tip That WILL Increase Enjoyment and Overall Return.

Practicing on a pokie means looking at the combinations and pay lines because there is ALWAYS a favourable way to bet (in terms of lines, multiplier, method, timing, variance) but unless you study the game, the wins, the randomes of it all – you will never have the information needed to arm yourself with the winning multiplier and line combination. So next time you play a pokie, whether for real money at your local pub or through one of our recommend online casinos I strongly suggest you spend some time ‘practicing’ and as you do look at the combination of lines against the multiplier. Look at the high paying jackpots and value of getting 3 of a kind versus 5 of a kind.

What you start to notice is that there are potential options for you to bet less per hit whilst increasing the amount you could potentially win each time. Example: I play Indian Dreaming at my local pub which is laid out in the typical 243 line format that is common of many modern Aristrocrat pokies and slot machines. Now I personally like to play 10 credits a line so that if and when I win something it is multiplied by 10 and effectively makes even a 50c win a healthy $5 collect. I then do NOT select all 25 lines as this would cost me $2.50 for each and every hit – and quite frankly I can’t afford to spend my money at that sort of rate, so I take the option to only play the first 3 lines which apparently only offers 7 lines and therefore only costs me 70c a press. BUT – and this is where the tip earns its praise – when you bet the first 3 lines on any of the 243 line pokies you still get the middle line of reels 4 and 5 activated – meaning the chance of getting 4 or 5 of a kind still exist, except now instead of 1 credit per line you get payouts at 10. Furthermore – and we can go back to Mathematics here – the odds of getting 4 or 5 of a kind are much lower than getting 3 of a kind so now you have increased your return rate by allowing yourself to get 10x the winnings on 3 of a kind wins which as we just established are guaranteed to occur more often than 4 or 5 of a kind.

Overall utilizing this method of playing the pokies does not guarantee that you will win more – but it does guarantee that you will last longer and spend a lot less on the pokies over the course of an evening. Logic does dictate however that the longer you spend playing the more your chances of winning a large jackpot increase – so it is fair then to say that THIS STRATEGY WILL INDEED INCREASE YOUR ODDS OF WINNING ON THE POKIES.

how to win at pokies with these slot machine tips

The above image illustrates exactly what I am talking about above. By betting only 5 credits per line on 7 lines we are
only paying 35c per bet, but as shown from this win, the player is still getting the fourth and fifth lines paying (centre only) but on 5 credits instead of 1 (and a total cost of 10c
over the full 25c bet on 1 credit per line) so in this instance the player will win $25.00 from a 35c bet as apposed to $5.00 from a 25c bet. Common sense people. It’s not rocket science (mind you it is almost as rare a trait these days)

slot machines tips are usually full of shitLearn more about my 243 Reel Ways Pokies Tip and Indian Dreaming in general by following this link here –> Indian Dreaming Pokies by Aristocrat

Looking for more slot machine tips and quick tricks to winning more money playing pokies and how to win at slots etc etc? Same. SO if and when you find them , bring them back here and allow me to explain to you why they are a complete and utter load of trollop